I used to envision exploring the world surrounded by friends, family, and even a partner at one time. All special people who shared my dreams. I pictured adventures we would take together, the memories we would create, and the moments that would bond us for life. I was so certain of that future that if money was ever an issue, I would’ve paid just so they could come along. And did during the times we were together.

But life had other plans. Those people—some of whom I thought would be with me forever—aren’t here. Not on the flights. Not in the photos. Not by my side. No love lost, God just said we should continue life in different ways.

Grieving those losses under the circumstances that caused them was hard. Letting go of who I thought would still be with me today? That was a process. A painful one. And I completely understand now, how people give up on life. How they stop dreaming. Stop going. Stop doing the things they once loved.

But I didn’t stay down.

I got back up and chose to keep living. I kept traveling. Some times crying in airports, on planes and while enjoying once in a lifetime experiences. Because they weren’t there like I thought they’d be. But, I kept chasing joy. And what I learned is this: waiting on other people will have you missing your life. The people may not be here, but the experiences still are. The sunsets. The laughter. The new cities. The moments that remind you you’re alive.

Time will pass either way. And many of you have heard me say, the only thing that scares me on this earth is regret. I don’t fear being alone (which is actually quite lovely), far from home, or outside my comfort zone. What I fear is being 75 years old and looking back, wishing I had done the things I had the chance to do when I was able. I fear regret more than I fear the unknown. And that’s what pushes me forward—even when it’s hard, even if it’s solo.

The time passes, regardless of whether we're active participants or passive observers. So ask yourself: What do you want to see when you look back? Do you want to reflect on regret and missed chances, or do you want to smile, knowing you embraced life fully and fearlessly?

Me? I’m choosing fulfillment. One solo trip at a time.

And to be very clear, even in a relationship, I’m still going to solo travel! My thought is, they won’t be able to go, or just won’t want to go, every single time. But the thing is, the right person will respect what you love and not hold you back! Choosing right is the “secret.”

-xoxo,

Candace Blair